How to destroy your old phone so your parents will buy you a new one

Blog post no. 4

 How to destroy your old phone so your parents   will buy you a new one
                            (How not to fix your phone)

Hey readers how's your life???
oh really,tell me more....
ahaan....
ok...
that's good....
So you could be reading this for only one reason
You are a spoilt brat who just got a new phone but after a few weeks
you found out that those bigshots at a company not naming but "coughapplecough" just released a new phone and you just got carried away because its Just 0.001 inch thinner and a bit longer than your perfectly normal 4s heck it even has the same features apart from a few that don't matter but you want a new one coz you are just a spoilt brat or a showoff or both,if that's the case then you've come to the right place.
In this post i'll show you how to destroy your old or perfectly normal phone.
(*note:bear in mind that this guide is for the new smart phones out there & not for nokia coz if you're thinking of destroying your nokia then you must be crazy as sh*t.*)
Well there are a couple of things that you'll need and should have lying around the house.

1) Magnet (BIGGER the better)
2) A hammer (same as above)
3) a pair of pliers
4) an assortment of screwdrivers (if you don't have them lying around then you should go kill yourself)
5) wire (3 foot in length atleast)
6) no knowledge of tools or phones (coz if you do then you won't be able to destroy your phone)

  step by step guide:-
1) Bring your magnet near your device(if it doesn't work then get a bigger magnet)

in theory: bringing the magnet closer to the phone will result in the scrambling of the instructions in the phone's rom. 

(Note:the phone can still be repaired by flashing and you can still sell it after flashing, if you don't want that then carry on reading)
2) open it up using a screwdriver and remove the battery and other things that you may find interesting.
   (if you are a guy like me then you'll find a lot of interesting goodies)
3) use the pliers to rip out the smaller pieces.
4) then use the wire to short circuit the electrical parts.
5) hit the remaining phone with the hammer and pound it to bits.
6) make a story that yor parents will believe like when you were
   crossing the street the phone fell out of your pocket and got
   run over by a car, include excrutiating details like how you tried to
   stop the car but ninja rainbow monkeys caught a hold of you and you
   were unable to stop it and then time slowed down and it was just
   like matrix, you even tried to dodge bullets and missiles to stop
   the car but the ninja rainbow monkeys stopped you.
   (tip: use a large quantity of bandage tape to make it look real
    but don't over do it)

disclaimer:-
the idea was Totally mine so don't try to copy it without my permission.
             Do not try to take apart the battery.
             any damage done to your phone is your problem not mine.
             If you get grounded or banished from your house its your fault not mine.
             If your parents buy you a nokia 103 after this then that is also your               

            problem not mine.(AND IT SERVES YOU RIGHT FOR BEING A SPOILT LITTLE BRAT)